Blind
by Hysteri
Summary: Riku POV. Riku reflects back on his past and Sora. Now, this can be read two different ways: How it was meant to be read, Yaoi/boy love/malexmale. Or extreme possessive friendship. Either one is fine by me.


DISCLAIMER: None be mine, me mateys! yo ho yo ho a pirates life for meeeeeee. -hiccup-

"_I love you Sora!_"

"_I know Riku. I love you too!_"

We had been kids back then. Simple. Plain. We could have shouted it out to the entire village and not have had a care in the world what they thought. Personally, Our mom's thought it was adorable; I think they even have a photo book dedicated to us between the years of 3 and 8. It's here somewhere, I'll find it eventually.

* * *

"_Night ku'! Love you._"

"_Night so'. Love you too._"

Countless times we had those stupid sleep over's, lasting till 3 in the morning before being on the brink of passing out, Or getting grounded. Either way, you always said it before flipping over and burying that head of spikes under the blankets with that goofy grin plastered to your face. I loved that grin…like you wouldn't even begin to believe.

* * *

Somewhere around middle school we stopped saying it. It becoming less frequent until it dispersed entirely. I'll admit, I kinda missed it. But you would never find that out, Would you Sora? Besides, You were going about drooling over Kairi.

And you would never believe how much I hated her for it.

* * *

Then the Darkness came. I tried to take you with me Sora; I tried to get you to grab my hand. I thought you would follow me. You always had before.

But you didn't. You stayed behind.

You stayed for her.

* * *

And after the darkness came, and I found Hollow Bastion; Maleficent, I thought I'd never see you again. Or Kairi. Or The Islands.

The only one I truly missed, Sora, Was you.

* * *

Then I finally found you. After all that searching in Traverse Town, throughout all the worlds, I had finally found you!

...And you hardly even cared. I searched everywhere for you, And you were off playing hero with the stupid keyblade.

I couldn't let that slide Sora, And Maleficent, well, she knew it.

* * *

"_I hate you._" That's what I told myself. I told myself that you were nothing. I hated everything you were.

I hated how you didn't care. And I hated how I didn't matter. I hated how you never even said 'I love you Riku!' anymore. I hated it all. And somehow, that pain, I couldn't shake it. Maybe it was the darkness I later learned about already draining what I had left of me. Maybe it was feeding off that hatred. It fed off every other last raw emotion I had until I felt nothing else BUT hatred. So maybe that was it.

Or maybe it was the thought that my best friend didn't love me anymore.

* * *

I wanted to hurt you.

I wanted to hurt you like you had hurt me. So after I got back Kairi, I dedicated my entire time to saving her.

She was all you ever wanted, All you ever talked about.

I wanted to take the only thing you had, just like she had done to me. I wanted you to see how I felt.

* * *

It wasn't enough. It just wasn't. I needed to take more than Kairi. I needed to hurt you _more._

So who better to take, then the 'friends' you replaced me with? I knew all about the keyblade, I knew how to pull just the right strings.

I pretended I didn't feel guilt wrap around my lungs as I tossed the old wooden sword we used to spare with.

It was a victory, I had thought. Even if it was a bitter one.

* * *

Even though Ansem had sucked me in, trapping me inside while he morphed my body to look like his, I saw everything. It was like watching a horror film.

And I helplessly stared as you got ready to release your heart so Kairi could awaken, flashing a goofy grin, like you weren't scared at all.

Maybe you weren't, But I was terrified.

I screamed and yelled, I begged for you not to do it. I fought with every single might I had in me. But it was too late.

I saved Kairi, I gave her time. I wouldn't let what you did be in vain. I couldn't.

* * *

**

I don't know how she saved you, but she did.

I didn't know what to feel: Elated, jealous, angry, sad? It was like a bubbled concoction of all four, each ripping at the other in a battle for dominance.

And I didn't know where your bravery came from, how you could stand there, our play islands ripped to pieces, face to face against some man who had stolen your best friends' body away to use as nothing more than but a mere vessel.

I realized then, That I didn't know who you were.

* * *

The next time I saw you after we closed the doors, You were in a glass case and Namine was trying to put you back together again.

I felt another spring of pain in my heart. Maybe that was the darkness again though. I'd been getting them a lot around that time. But, It was different. I don't know how, it just was.

Yeah, Maybe I should have told Diz around that time.

But I didn't. Maybe it was out of fear.

Oh well...

* * *

I met your Nobody. Roxas. Number XIII.

He looked so much like you...But he was as cold as stone. He hated me. I didn't know why. But he was your nobody, and half of those days spent fighting him, Tracking him, Even talking to him made me think secretly you hated me too. Hated what I had become. Hated who I was.

And I didn't know if I could take facing you Sora. After you woke up, I wanted so bad to tell you everything. Everything from day one till that point. But I couldn't. I already had taken the form of Ansem. I couldn't face you Sora, Not then, Not ever.

Diz seemed to understand that, And told me it was for the best...

I never believed him.

* * *

I followed you everywhere. If you noticed, You never gave a clue. I thought you would surely recognize me in the 'Land of Dragons'. With my blade and all; But you never caught on.

You never recognized my fighting style, Or 'Way to Dawn'. And I didn't know if I should've been glad and relieved, or sad and hurt.

All I knew was what Diz told me; It was for the best.

* * *

Finally, we met up in 'The World That Never Was'. And for a moment, I couldn't believe you were actually crying.

And I felt so selfish for enjoying every minute of it. I mean, You didn't cry for her. But you never said 'I love you Riku!' either...

And I swear at that moment, All I could here was Diz's deep voice telling me; It's for the best.

* * *

We did it Sora! We defeated them all. Xemnas, His nobodies. We conquered the darkness!

And then we you told me you would stay in the darkness, with me, I savored it. I couldn't tell you the absolute pleasure I got from those words.

But then you somehow opened the door to light.

And who was I to decline your offer?

The darkness wasn't anything if you weren't there with me.

It wasn't from the start.

* * *

** This section, I know that Ansem said in the first game that Riku couldn't hear Sora, but in this im merely suggesting that Ansem lied and Riku could hear everything. Ansem doesn't seem like the truthful type anyway, so neh.

Well, I am, in fact, alive. Just a little one shot thing I've had finished for some time. I understand that nothing about Xion, or anything mentioned in BBS is really in here. I kinda focused on the main two games and just ignored Chain of Memories, 358/2 days, Birth By Sleep, and Coded. I kinda get sick of reading spoilers, and if you seriously haven't played the first two games (or watched all the clips xD) well then, sorry. I didn't wanna spoil anything for people who aren't finished with all of the side games though (and although my bf likes to ruin everything about coded -_- I haven't even played it fully yet, so how the hell can I write about it eh? not to mention im only just finishing BBS cause im lazzzzy xD) If I feel like I wanna add more, I might re-write this, but as of now, im satisfied.

Hope you are too! Reviews are always welcomed and adored, and not to mention appreciated. I hope to (one day) rewrite all of my stories, but my absence i guess speaks volumes: my muse is missing. If you do happen to find it, please turn it in to your local animal shelter as for it to be contained. It can be quite parasitic and I wouldn't want anyone being harmed: All officials have been notified and you can rest easy knowing it got back to me safely. If not, contribute the the F.M.M.F. by reviewing o.o

F.M.M.F. approves of this message. (Find My Muse Fund, for all of those who were wondering.)


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